Early in my recent pilgrimage to the Holy Land with members of the Newman community one of many recurring themes became evident, being the call of Christ to follow Him as disciples.  Upon arrival in our first destination at the Church of the Annunciation in Nazareth it became clear that no one better answered this call than the young teen Miriam. Despite any anxiety she harboured towards the difficult path God called her to, she willingly put her life in God’s hands in her answer “I am the Lord’s servant…May it be done to me as you have said.” (NIV Luke 1:38).  Such an answer is one to revere greatly and one, which many if not most of us wish we had the strength to make on a consistent basis. Through prayer at this Holy Site and others, I like many of my fellow pilgrims, found myself asking that I could summon the strength to make my entire life pleasing to God.

Perhaps what tends to hold us back is our own human frailty and weakness in feeling that we are too unworthy to be servants following closely in Christ’s footsteps.  Rather than appropriately focusing on the Graces God lovingly grants us on a daily basis we dwell on those painful times when we’ve turned our backs on Him and on the mistakes we’ve made on our own personal paths to discipleship.  Somewhere during this voyage it became apparent that the beauty of God’s call is that it matters not where we’ve gone or what we’ve done, but like St. Peter, St. Paul, St. Matthew and countless others where we are prepared to journey with Christ.In life one is constantly confronted with a number of choices, which affect all dimensions of our being, the spiritual side especially. We can choose to follow in the path Christ has and is illuminating before us, or wander helplessly in another direction. However, as an example, through the mercy Jesus displayed to Peter, whom He loved dearly, even if we turn our backs to and deny Him, when he counts on us the most, just as Peter did, the minute we are prepared to rejoin Him, Christ presents us with the same challenge presented to Peter; “Feed my lambs,…Take care of my sheep,…Feed my sheep.” (NIV John 21:15-19) The example of St. Peter is one indeed to emulate as in all ways he is just like us, weak, frail, and full of suffering, but always willing and never too proud to return to Christ.

The image of Peter suffering is one certainly worth contemplating. Perhaps the most vivid example of this was after Peter’s denial of Christ. Surrounding that night in particular, the Gospels are full of moments when Peter, as a human would have suffered or felt uneasy. Imagine Peter’s personal reaction moments later to the various events of that night. He goes from unworthiness when Christ washes his feet; to disbelief and a pledge of undying support when Christ informs the twelve of His imminent death; to guilt when he is found sleeping in the garden; and finally to anger when he attacks one of the soldiers arresting Christ. Each of these instances displays a human weakness each of us experiences on a regular basis. In praying and venerating each of these and many other spots in
the Holy Land we were in some way asking that St. Peter, knowing our weaknesses and sufferings, would intercede on our behalf and ask Christ, his beloved friend to strengthen us on our journey.

Despite our failings and torments, we are constantly called to join Christ at His banquet. Perhaps the most vivid example of how we can manifest this call in our lives is to recognize Christ in the people around us. During our pilgrimage at countless times our group ate and drank together.  While these purely social situations and events gave us an opportunity to laugh and get to know the people we were traveling with, they also served a very different purpose. It soon became clear through prayer and reflection on the Gospels that it is in recognizing Christ in the breaking of the Bread that we come to share in the Divine Kingdom of our Lord.  It is at this precise moment, whether it takes place during Mass, at Dinner with a group of people in any social setting, or while sharing a loaf of bread on a bus ride from Nazareth to Tiberius that we are acting in a manner that is truly indicative of the life we are called to lead.   Like the poor, confused, and disappointed disciples walking away from Jerusalem to Emmaus after Christ’s death, it is a challenge for each of us to recognize Christ in our neighbours and turn back to where we are coming from in order to find the risen Christ.

For most of the group, this trip was the first to the Holy Land. While everyone was excited for the trip, many came with some reservations based on a fear of what we might encounter in the Middle East. As we were told while visiting one of the first sites, not succumbing to fear is a necessary precursor
to receiving God’s many graces. In our time
in the Holy Land, and for those who continued to Rome, the social moments were some of the best. Be it while sharing a laugh, recounting life experiences, or simply chatting over a glass or two of wine, the opportunity we were afforded to get to know those around us truly enriched the pilgrimage. In sharing the things we felt and we had experienced, we got to know and see the God given gifts inherent in each one of those around us. So while some of the most memorable moments may have occurred in the confines of one of the great pilgrim sites, the thirty-eight people we shared each moment of joy and pain with made just as much an impact.
In one final reflection I would like to try and summarize the feeling of praying and receiving reconciliation in the Garden of Gethsemane.  While our path to discipleship is often laden with missteps and sometimes painful tumbles, we have each been given the ability to be restored to our proper places at Christ’s table through the Sacrament of Reconciliation.  Praying for forgiveness in the place where Christ suffered in agony to an extent none of us can begin to imagine is a truly humbling feeling.  Though our lives may not always be faithful to our baptismal promises, by way of the mercy and love of God and His Son Jesus Christ we are always being afforded the opportunity return to His fold. Since returning I find myself constantly praying that I can answer my call with the faith of His servant and mother Miriam, and His friend Peter. Rather than dwell on the past it is imperative that we focus on the future with one question at the heart of our prayer…Where are we prepared to go alongside Christ?